Today

It's been one year. One year ago today my dearest friend departed this mortal earth for places unknown.

In many ways it feels like it's been a very long year, but I feel like it was just yesterday we were chatting on the phone. Truth is I haven't stopped talking to her. Nearly every day there is something I want to tell her about, or ask for her advice, except now it's mostly in my head. I can hear her responses though, as clear as if she was across from me in the kitchen, or on the other end of the phone line, her laughter, her silliness, her sage advice (usually to 'smarten up') when I need a kick in the @$$.

Miss you...

Excuses

You know that feeling, when you try on a pair of pants, look at yourself in the mirror and think 'these pants make me look really fat'. I'm realizing (as this happens more and more frequently) that it's not the pants that are making me look fat.

I come from a slender family, my dad can (and does) eat anything, exercises never, and is skinny as a beanpole, my mom too is slender without any effort. I too was slender right up until my late 20s, at which point a switch to a sedentary desk job, two pregnancies fairly close together, and a baby who NEVER.SLEPT.EVER (with accompanying coffee addiction and exercise aversion) started the upward climb in my pants size.

The reality is I've been hiding behind these excuses for years now, while bit by bit the scales inch higher. I'll drop weight when Jonah starts sleeping, when we have more time to cook healthier fare, when I buy a treadmill, when I buy proper running shoes, when we move to a better neighbourhood, when I have more energy, when I'm not so busy, when the weather is better. So many excuses, and still the needle climbs.

I need to stop making excuses. I'm not certain where to start, it seems so overwhelming now, but I can't keep going this way. My kids don't need a mom who can't keep up with them, or who is dead before they hit highschool.

I'd like my hour back please.

I'm not a morning person.

Winter tends to be tough for me because it's dark when I get up in the morning (dark when I shower, brush my teeth, drink my tea, still dark when I leave for work). Just when the mornings were starting to brighten up... damned early daylight savings time again. It wasn't such a huge problem when it started in April, but now... just when mother nature was giving us a glorious taste of morning sunshine the powers that be who feel an inescapable urge to tinker with things push back the clock so that my morning routine and commute are, again, in the dark.

Forget that the sun goes down later, that it's bright now when I'm having dinner, I'm normally quite chipper in the evenings sun or not. It's the morning sunshine I need!

I have been ridiculously cranky this week. I know, there's probably more to it than just my stolen hour of sleep and my precious morning sunshine, the rain and cold don't help either, but DST is certainly a worthy target for my ire.

At least there are lovely sunsets over the lake.... oh, except this 'lake' is a farmer's field. Love that Spring flooding :)

The sleepover

This year for her birthday Katie wanted to have a couple of friends sleep over at our house. She's had friends sleep over before (1 at a time) so I didn't see any harm in it. Well holy cow, 4 friends (5 little girls in total, plus token J-man) is waaaaay different than 1 at a time. The noise level, the dramas, the cat fights, and that was all before dinner! We had 'make your own pizza' for dinner (flour flying everywhere, piles of cheese several inches high), and decorate your own cupcake for dessert (much more subdued than the cheese, but we lit and blew out the candles so many times they were nothing but stumps).

She had a blast, but the last of them didn't fall asleep until after 11:00pm and they were ALL up before 7:00 this morning. I don't think we'll be repeating this any time soon, not until she and her friends are a LOT older.

One last skate

The Rideau Canal Skateway officially closes tonight for the season (in about 15 minutes actually). Weatherman is calling for warm temperatures and rain, so it was inevitable. It was a pretty good stretch this year.

We couldn't resist one last skate (and, of course, a Beavertail.) Goodbye for another year skateway...

(and yes, I'm wearing Katie's hat. We forgot to bring along her thin hat for under her helmet, so she's wearing mine and I'm wearing hers. Might need to get me one of those actually, it's pretty cute on me ;) )

Griping about nothing

The daycare is taking the kids tubing on March Break (Jonah's age group Tuesday, Katie's Thursday), yay, that's fun. They say your kid MUST have a helmet to go along, OK, I like the idea of helmets if I'm not going to be there to supervise my own kids (and besides, we already have helmets) but then it says if your kid doesn't have a helmet not only can they not come on the trip but they can't come to the daycare at all that day.

Excuse me?

We pay to send our kids here and you'd deny someone (keeping in mind only half of the group is going each day so there'll still be kids and teachers at the centre) childcare that day because they can't afford to spend $100 on a snowboard helmet the kid would wear once??? (Again, we already have helmets, but there are a lot of kids in the centre who are there on subsidy whose parents are new to the country and likely couldn't afford a helmet, plus good luck FINDING a helmet in March, snowboarding/skating season is over dude). Did they also include any suggestions for rentals - heck no. I'm cheesed, not because I don't believe in helmets (I do) or because I don't have helmets (I do) but because that is so unfair to say pony up the cash or keep your kids at home. Grrrrrrr.

Sign sign

I seldom drive when C is in the car, I'm much happier to be a passenger. However I'm also one of those people who gets carsick if I try to read or craft in the car, so I spend a LOT of time looking out the window. Which is where I saw this funny window cling. In case your French is as poor as mine it reads "Warning: this car is like another man's wife, look, admire but don't touch". Hehehe, struck me as funny (though it was on a Hyundai, not exactly the kind of trophy wife I'd expect to garner a lot of attention anyway. Now if it was a Porche.... however no one in their right mind would put a sticker on a Porche)

Birthday Princess

I can't believe she's 8, I swear she was just born yesterday. She's just so grown up, she asked for (and got) an MP3 player for her birthday, and now it's loaded up with Jonas Brothers songs. She has tastes and preferences not just different than mine but for things I don't even know about. She's growing and changing so fast, becoming so independent. It's exciting, exhilarating and terrifying.